I Suspect CNN Anchors are Being Treated for Microaggressions After GOP Victory

By Todd Starnes/Twitter

The Democrats earned another moral victory last night — losing a special election to fill Georgia’s sixth congressional district.

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Republican Karen Handel defeated Democrat Jon Ossoff — in the most expensive House race in history.

“Women in this community stood up,” Mr. Ossoff said in his concession speech. It’s true – they stood up, got in the cars, drove to a polling place and voted for Ms. Handel. 

Mr. Ossoff, who bore a striking resemblance to “Pajama Boy”, did not even live in the district — but he did have the backing of Hollywood, the Mainstream Media and $23 million in mostly out-of-state campaign money.

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CNN anchors actually predicted the Georgia congressional race was a definitive referendum on President Trump.

Turns out — they were absolutely right. Congratulations, Mr. President – now 4-0 in congressional races against Democrats and the Mainstream Media. 

On a side note – there was no truth to rumors that CNN had to evacuate it’s staff to a special broadcast studio in a nearby designated safe space. I may have inadvertently started that rumor — my bad. 

Hollywood was hit especially hard by the loss. Cedars-Sinai had to declare a ‘Code Black’ to deal celebrities and CNN anchors crippled by raging cases of microaggressions. (Just kidding, folks).

But don’t feel bad for Mr. Ossoff. Yes – he may be a loser – but he went back to his own congressional district with a shiny new $23 million participation trophy.

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