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Google Forces Users to Celebrate Lesbian Velma

Google used its search engine Thursday to throw a Gay Pride parade whenever users typed “Velma” into the search bar. Watch the video at the bottom of the story.

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STARNES: [01:24:18] All right, folks. Yesterday we told you the breaking news from Cartoon World that Velma Dinkley is a lesbian. Yes, we said it. Ladies and gentlemen, The Washington Post. This is the lead paragraph. In just 13 seconds, a viral clip from the latest Scooby-Doo movie released on streaming services this week scuttled decades of speculation and fan debates. Velma Dingley is gay, undoubtedly, unambiguously gay. May I just ask, why is this even a major news story? For one thing, Velma is not gay. Velma is a cartoon character who was created to portray a geeky girl. Not a lesbian. Anyway. Grace Baker, you were telling me in the break to do something and it made me very nervous. So you told me to go to Google. And so we’re going to ask our audience to do this because I want to get their reaction to what I just saw on my computer screen. So you told me to go to Google and type in the search. Velma. Is that right? [01:25:35][76.3]

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GRACE: [01:25:35] Yep. [01:25:35][0.0]

STARNES: [01:25:36] All right, so I typed in Velma and nothing happened for a second, and then all of a sudden, the screen was filled with, like, some sort of a celebration with gay pride flags and confetti and all that kind of stuff. [01:25:49][13.4]

GRACE: [01:25:49] Oh, yeah. You had the trans flag. You know, you had the gay pride flag because now they’re just, you know, they keep changing the flag. So I can’t keep up with that. And the confetti is everywhere all over your screen. Can’t miss it. [01:26:01][11.3]

STARNES: [01:26:02] Uh, Velma, this is from The Washington Post story. Again, we’re talking about a major American newspaper. In a later scene, Velma professes her thirst for Diablo. [01:26:14][12.1]

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GRACE: [01:26:15] What the? [01:26:15][0.1]

STARNES: [01:26:17] I’m just reading here. Quote, I’m crushing big time. Oh, I’ve got to get into the lesbian voice. I’m crushing big time, Daphne. What do I do? What do I say? [01:26:27][10.4]

STARNES: [01:26:30] Trinity Wheeler, an 18 year old student from Ontario, Canada, was the first person to share a clip from the new film online, adding the caption in all caps OMG lesbian Velma finally. After 48 hours, the video has been played more than five and a half million times more than received more than 200,000 likes. Well, that’s not a lot of like some it has been seen 5.0. But you know why? Because nobody cares about this stuff. And they don’t like these radical LGBT mobs taking great cartoon characters from our childhood and turning them gay. [01:27:03][33.2]

GRACE: [01:27:04] I love Scooby Doo. One of my favorites. [01:27:06][2.4]

STARNES: [01:27:07] Just why… I wasn’t a big fan of Scrappy-Doo. Make Scrappy-Doo a lesbian. [01:27:10][3.1]

GRACE: [01:27:12] Oh,. [01:27:12][0.0]

STARNES: [01:27:13] But you got. [01:27:14][0.4]

GRACE: [01:27:14] Characters you don’t like. [01:27:15][0.8]

STARNES: [01:27:15] Superman, Batman, Robin. [01:27:18][2.9]

GRACE: [01:27:19] Robin. We all kind of suspected that. [01:27:21][1.6]

STARNES: [01:27:21] Wonder Woman, Aquaman and the Dolphin. You’ve got Spider-Man now, who’s gay. I mean, Thor. [01:27:29][8.5]

GRACE: [01:27:31] Can’t keep up with it. [01:27:32][0.8]

STARNES: [01:27:32] Bert and Ernie. [01:27:33][0.7]

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GRACE: [01:27:35] Again suspected that one. [01:27:36][1.1]

STARNES: [01:27:37] Why would you suspect they’re just friendly puppets. [01:27:39][1.5]

GRACE: [01:27:39] I mean the rubber duckie song was a little weird. [01:27:41][2.0]

STARNES: [01:27:42] All right, I’ll give you that. But all I’m saying is, why can’t we let children be children? Why is everything being turned into an LGBT pride parade? Why is that? [01:27:53][11.2]

GRACE: [01:27:54] It’s also just turning sexual in general. It’s just kind of creepy. [01:27:58][3.8]

STARNES: [01:27:58] I mean, what’s next? Really? What’s next? George Jetson wearing buttless leather chaps. [01:28:03][4.8]

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GRACE: [01:28:06] Poor Astro. [01:28:06][0.2]

STARNES: [01:28:08] Ruh-roh, George. I don’t know. But it’s disgusting. And it’s despicable. If you want to create gay and lesbian cartoon characters, go and create gay and lesbian cartoon characters. It’s a free country, but you don’t have a right to go and co-opt something that’s already out there. Do they have the art? Do they have the makers? The creators of Scooby Doo? Do they have their permission to turn their beloved character into some sort of a political statement? I mean, do that. What’s next? Charlie Brown. [01:28:39][30.4]

GRACE: [01:28:40] Charlie Brown in the Great was at the Great Pumpkin. [01:28:42][1.7]

STARNES: [01:28:44] Oh, there, Schroeder. It’s always the piano player. I’m just saying. [01:28:48][4.0]

GRACE: [01:28:50] The Jazz hands. [01:28:50][0.4]

STARNES: [01:28:51] Lucy, I mean, where do you draw the line with this stuff? But people really. I don’t want anyone, okay? It’s just. Go to Google and type in Velma and see what happens and give us a call. Let us know what you I mean, literally, Google is now celebrating the rebirth, I guess. Velma, who, by the way, wasn’t the whole thing, the whole gay rights movement. They were born that way, right? That was the whole gay rights. But we were born that way. Velma wasn’t born that way. [01:29:18][27.4]

GRACE: [01:29:21] She. I’m telling you, she dated Shaggy at one point. It was a thing. Well. [01:29:24][3.0]

Read Todd’s book about how President Trump’s agenda can save America: “Culture Jihad: How to Stop the Left From Killing a Nation.”

STARNES: [01:29:25] I’m just saying. And what’s up with those Scooby snacks? I don’t think those were Scooby snacks. [01:29:30][5.2]

GRACE: [01:29:31] Oh, there’s definitely the. [01:29:32][1.1]

STARNES: [01:29:32] Code for something else. Anyway [01:29:34][1.8]

GRACE: [01:29:35] Beats me. [01:29:35][0.1]

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